“In Love With Your Philosophy”


This may be the best philosophy-inspired parody of a pop song ever…

…with a video full of visual gags. If Ed Sheeran’s “Shape of You” were about philosophy:

Lyrics:

The bar isn’t the best place to find a lover
so the library’s where I go
me with no friends at a table in the stacks,
I read fast and keep my voice low

You’re over there writing a dissertation on something
and you trust me to give it a glance, now
it’s penned on an issue I’ve been ruminating upon
and it makes me doubt my stance
and now I’m thinkin’ like

Girl you know I want your mind
you’re analytical and literary
come at me intellectually
I may be wrong I’ll take critique

You say boy, for me to like you much
you’ll have to keep pace and reason proper with me
come on, think logically
come, come on think logically
mm hmm hmm

I’m in love with your point of view
we push uphill like Sisyphus do
and though I like your glasses too,
I’m in love with your philosophy
you left you papers in my room
made me start to think like you
reevaluating things I thought I knew
I’m in love with your philosophy

a priori-ori-ori, I’m in love with your philosophy
a priori-ori-ori, I’m in love with your philosophy
a posteriori-ori, I’m in love with your quale

is everything made out of one substance, or two?
I’m an idealist about you

Pondering the machinations of things
like counterfactual causation
because the possible world
where I mess up with this girl
is just a fallacy away

we talk for hours about the utilitarian calculus
of the lives that your money could save
you leave to get on the transit, then you put on your headset
and you start to listen to a debate
and now I’m thinkin’ like

Girl you know I want your mind
it epitomizes perspicacity
engage me intellectually
I been thinkin’ lately, constantly

You say boy, you may think too much
but that doesn’t mean that all your points are robust
lay it out formally, come, lay it out formally
mm hmm hmm

I’m in love with your point of view
we empathize like a realist do
you turn my heart all bleen and grue
I’m in love with your philosophy

last night you were quoting Hume
and you were doin’ it impromptu
every day affirming things I thought I knew
that induction cannot prove

a priori-ori-ori, I’m in love with your philosophy
a priori-ori-ori, I’m in love with your philosophy
a posteriori-ori, I’m in love with your quale

Assuming that I’ve got it properly construed
I’m in love with your point of view

Come on be my sine qua non (x 7)
Barba non facit philosophum

I’m in love with your point of view
I’m convinced of your Ps and Qs
I hope to pass your peer review
I’m in love with your philosophy
you stole my copies of Camus
and now I think I feel less blue
you know, baby, it’s an existential truth
that I’m in love with your philosophy

Come on be my sine qua non
help me figure out what’s goin’ on
where did all this matter come from?
and is its conclusion forgone?
is my mind an epiphenomenon?
should I take a lens grinding job?
Can everything be infinitely split in two?
I’m in love with being confused


Of course, your suggestions of other philosophy-inspired song parodies not to miss are welcome.

(From Negating Silence, via Philosophical Theses You Have Never Seen Because They’re Extremely Weak)

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Eddy Nahmias
Eddy Nahmias
6 years ago

Wow! That would get an A+ on my assignment to write philosophical songs.

Brian
Brian
6 years ago

Love all the references, and so catchy!

jmugg
6 years ago

And set in Toronto! I wrote a fair bit of my dissertation in that library on Young Street.